This week, a bunch of folks have contacted me, asking if we’re all right here in little old PMR (“Transnistria”). The answer is: yes, all is fine here. But there’s been a lot of scary talk in the news, so I thought I’d lay out what’s been going on.
You know, it’s kind of funny to me that, after all the strange, mysterious, and even supernatural stuff that’s happened to me in my life, you’d think I’d be used to expecting the unexpected.
But honestly? I never, not even in a million years, would’ve guessed that it would be MI6 that saved my life (and that of my family, friends, and neighbors) last week.
Yes, yes, it’s all true, although, of course, you won’t hear it about it on the “mainstream” news. Perhaps, in ten years or a hundred years time, the details will come out.
In the meantime, I guess it’s left to little old me to tell the tale.
Red Rover, Red Rover, Send Nazis Right Over
Here is an ultra-brief summary of how the war in Ukraine has been unfolding, with regard to PMR:
February 24, 2022 – Invasion of Ukraine begins
March 2022 – Negotiators from Ukraine and Russia meet several times in Belarus and Turkey to try to work out a ceasefire and/or peace deal.
At the same time, Ukraine blocks the only official border crossing into PMR with mines and huge concrete blocks and all sorts of ridiculous shit in fear of an “invasion” from PMR. They also blew up the railway line between PMR and Ukraine (on the Ukrainian side).
April 9, 2022 – Then British PM Boris Johnson flies to Ukraine and orders Ukrainian leader Zelensky to break off all peace talks.
About the same time period in April – Someone (most likely Ukrainians) set off a minor explosion at a PMR military facility in Parcani/Parkany (nobody injured and no damage). They also blow up part of a huge Soviet-era radio antenna complex located outside a tiny village in central PMR that retransmits medium-wave broadcasts from Russia by climbing up the tower and attaching explosives to it.
About a week later, there’s another attempt to blow it up via a jury-rigged UAV that fails after the UAV’s wings got caught in some cabling.
April 25, 2022 – Three Ukrainian militants fire RPGs at a government building in central Tiraspol. Luckily, no one got hurt.
Mid-April 2022 – Ukrainian presidential advisor Alexei Arestovich starts publicly calling on Ukraine to invade PMR and “liberate it” from Russian forces.
September-December 2022 – After huge setbacks fighting the Russians, Ukrainian officials (mostly Arestovich but also some others) repeat the “offer” to Moldova to invade and “liberate” PMR from “Russian occupation.”.
You can get a flavor of what this homicidal crap sounds like by reading this article (🇷🇺). The language is Russian, the website is Ukrainian, and the whole rotten thing is funded by NATO and the European Union.
The article above calls for the “liquidation” of PMR. I picked this one to share because it, ironically, acknowledges the fact that PMR was created partly thanks to volunteer fighters from Ukraine, which is pretty (darkly) hilarious.
Anyway, aside from NATO and EU just casually advocating genocide and mass murder, the truth is that the calls for Ukraine to invade PMR mostly died down at the end of December (especially after Arestovich was forced to resign after he correctly stated that Ukraine blew up an apartment building in Dnipropetrovsk with a missile) and didn’t pick back up again until late January after Ukraine started sustaining massive, massive losses on the battlefield.
From Moldova’s perspective, there are two things to remember. First, Moldova claims PMR as part of its “sovereign territory,” which means any armed attack by Ukraine on PMR would be considered by everyone in Moldova (including its dumbest politicians) as an invasion of Moldova.
Secondly, exactly zero percent of the electorate in Moldova would be in favor of “inviting” Ukraine’s military to attack Moldova’s “own” territory.
Truly, there is no appetite for war whatsoever in Moldova (including a Moldovan attack on PMR). And it must be remembered that hundreds of thousands of people in PMR are Moldovans with family members and friends on the other side of the border, including my wife.
Which brings us up to what’s been going on over the past month or so.
Novit enim Dominus qui sunt eius
It truly does boggle the mind how many Western “experts” there are out there on PMR, including “military experts” like the rabid jackal Ben Hodges who have never been to PMR, don’t speak any of the local languages, and don’t know jack shit about this place.
Nonetheless, a “consensus” amongst the morons in the West has been formed that more or less goes like this:
- PMR is a puppet Russian state run directly by Moscow and is inhabited almost entirely by Russians.
- The Russian army is well-entrenched on PMR soil.
- Russia’s military goal in Ukraine is to “link up” with PMR by driving west to Odessa.
- Once Russia’s military arrives in PMR, this will form a bridgehead for the invasion of Moldova and other parts west (Romania, EU, et al).
None of that is true. None of it. Not a single part. But that never stopped any of these morons before :)
Here’s the real truth:
- The PMR government and the Kremlin are close, but PMR is hardly an obedient puppet state.
- The majority of PMR citizens are not ethnic Russians. In fact, there are just as many Ukrainians as there are Russians in PMR (and everyone gets along just fine).
- The Russian military garrison in PMR is tiny (~1200 men) and extremely poorly equipped. They have zero planes or helicopters and only a handful of aging howitzers and armored vehicles (literally during the last military parade in 2019, I saw two of them break down right on the main street of Tiraspol).
- Literally nobody in PMR wants to fight a war against anybody or have their country used as a base to attack someone else.
- Russia has zero desire to invade or occupy Moldova or anywhere else in Europe.
But, of course, nobody wants to downgrade a “Russian menace” in PMR to “a few guys with 40-year-old tanks and no missiles” 😭
How the (War) Sausage Is Made
Aside from dealing with the “threat” of a PMR-based Russian attack on Ukraine, there is another factor that has become of critical importance in the last month, which is why everyone’s been writing to me and asking if I’m okay.
It has to do with the Kobasna/Cobasna (various spellings depending on which language you use) ammunition dump located outside the tiny PMR village of that name about three hours’ drive north of Tiraspol and just 2 kilometers (🇺🇸 1.2 miles) across the border from Ukraine.
Inside that dump is 200,000 tons of military ordinance of various sizes, kinds, and calibers, and all of it is Soviet-era stuff. It is literally the largest ammo dump in all of Europe. In fact, if someone were to blow it all up at once, it would be the equivalent (in explosive, not radiological, power) to an atomic bomb.
Imagine what that looks to Ukraine’s beleaguered army these days. Woah! A gigantic reservoir of all the things it desperately needs. And best of all, it’s there for the taking! It’s lightly guarded! And all of it is Soviet stuff that the Ukrainian military is well-trained on how to use.
Like a military fairytale, am I right?
Well, not quite.
Firstly, the “freshest” stuff in that dump is more than 30 years old, and some of it is up to 70 or 80 years old.
Secondly, it’s being stored in a series of huge warehouses that are not climate-controlled. That means it gets hot in the summer and cold in the winter, and it’s all getting rustier and more degraded and covered in spiderwebs and rat turds every day.
Third, it’s not an “active” warehouse site because nobody (not even Russia or PMR) is putting in new material or taking anything out. This means that nobody is doing maintenance or upgrades or much of anything else to preserve the operational quality of the stuff that’s in there.
Fourth, some of the stuff in there is irrelevant such as rotten gas masks and cracked helmets and other weird Soviet crap like radiation detectors.
The Russian soldiers who guard the place (called OGRF) only spend a tiny portion of their time patrolling the fences and stopping would-be thieves. Most of their time is actually spent on doing spot checks to prevent accidents or on firefighting drills.
BTW, I know all this because there are several great (Russian-language) news channel documentaries where they visit the place. It’s not exactly Area 51 😜
The reason all this old military crap is in warehouses in a tiny village in PMR is because that’s where the Soviets dumped it after their country fell apart. The original plan was actually to ship it off to Russia back in the 1990s and then properly dispose of it, but that fell through due to complex political reasons, so it’s sat around getting older and more unstable since.
Oddly enough, the name of the village (Kobasna) is the Russian word for “sausage,” so sometimes you see it get written that way in translated documents, which is pretty hilarious. If you’re American (or Polish), you’re probably familiar with the word “kielbasa” which is just the Polish way to say sausage.
Ben Wallace and MI6
A couple of weeks ago, the Kiev regime seems to have dusted off its plan once again to attack PMR and seize the Kobasna ammo dump in order to resupply its military.
At one point, a bunch of heavy trucks were spotted at the nearest railway station across the border in Ukraine, and members of the neo-Nazi Azov brigade showed up as well, making clear that Ukraine was seriously considering making a move on Kobasna.
The final stage of the plan was to dress up Azov troops in Russian military uniforms and then claim that Russia had attacked Ukraine from PMR, making it “necessary” to cross into PMR (and loot the ammo dump).
What stopped the idiots in Kiev? Well, believe it or not, it was MI6. Yes, that MI6, the British foreign “intelligence” service. Some well-heeled genocidal maniac with excellent diction in London picked up the phone and told Zelensky not to do it.
The UK’s military chief, Ben Wallace, then made a public speech at a NATO meeting, telling Ukraine to “save ammo by shooting more accurately” after Ukraine was begging Britain (and other NATO countries) for more shells.
Do I know why MI6 and the elites in London decided to go this route, prohibiting an attack on PMR in order to loot Cobasna, and instead focus on “learning efficient NATO strategies” for war fighting? No, I do not.
But the rumor is that someone in MI6 was convinced that Ukraine invading PMR would lead to a Russian nuclear strike and an escalation of the war beyond the borders of Ukraine.
For sparing my family’s life, I am grateful. But never, ever think that these fuckers give a shit about me or or anyone else in this entire region. They’d kill us all without losing a wink of sleep, if it suited their purposes.
Nonetheless, the tentative plan to invade PMR and loot the Kobasna ammo dump has led to a bunch of foolishness.
First, the Kiev regime egged on Moldovan President Maia Sandu by telling her that (Russian) Chechen troops were going to “seize” the Chisinau airport, while a bunch of Serbian and Montenegrins were going to sneak into the country and then take over government buildings, grab hostages, and overthrow the Moldovan government in a coup.
All ludicrous, of course, but the press covered it relentlessly. Then the new PM Dorin Recean (who works for the US, not the UK) started blabbering on about how Russia is going to invade Moldova (proper, not PMR), and that Russian secret agents were “everywhere” in Moldova.
Hilariously, this was just days before Recean attended a foreign investor conference, saying that Moldova was on the cusp of becoming a full member of the EU and was therefore just as safe a place to invest as Romania or Poland. You think I’m joking, but I’m really not (🇲🇩).
That is some circus level shit right there, but that’s how it goes goes, these days 🤡
But don’t think that Moldova’s (and Ukraine’s) shenanigans with regard to PMR went unnoticed in Moscow because it sure as hell did not.
In a move that’s standard for Russian President Putin, the above policy shift on PMR is mostly technical, but it’s meant to serve as a warning for anyone smart enough to understand it (so not Americans, in other words LOL) to quit fucking around and playing games with PMR.
For now, we’re safe here in PMR, including the peaceful villagers who live in Kobasna. And the folks in Moldova are also perfectly safe from any Russian military threat, at least for now (Ukraine, meanwhile, has dropped a total of four errant S-300 missiles into Moldova since the war began plus killed two Moldovan truck drivers with an artillery strike on a civilian customs post in Russia just across the Ukrainian border).
But honestly? There’s really no telling just how crazy shit might get over the next few weeks and months as Kiev and America and its vassals in Europe keep on losing to Russia.
In the meantime, all the talk about coups and invasions in Moldova is mostly just political theater to try to a) promote more anti-Russian hysteria around the world b) weasel more weapons and money out of the USA and Europe for Moldova and c) distract the Moldovan people from just how disastrous their government is. The last poll I saw showed just 32% of the country now support the president of Moldova and her ruling PAS party.
All any of us can do in the meantime is just keep putting one foot in front of the other and hope that sanity prevails before these idiots annihilate all of us from the face of the Earth.
5 thoughts on “The Sword of Dumbassocles”
Recruiting started today in Transnistria. I’m sure Sam will volunteer.
Quote: “…and even supernatural stuff that’s happened to me…”
So, the aliens finally probed you anally?
Sam cel dus cu pluta, you’re the man to follow! If you’re saying that nothing will happen in Transnistria, then we should take note!
I remember your ramblings on this blog before 24th of February 2022. You were making fun of all the loonies that were saying “Putin will start the war soon”. You had all the confidence in the world, logoree cât cuprinde, haha ce proști, Putin nu pornește niciun război.
Of course, you having some mental issues will help you overcome the fact that you were off in assessing the reality in the past.
Ești din ce în ce mai dus cu pluta, te depărtezi pe zi ce trece de orice forma de realitate, ți-ai pierdut ancora. Toate cele bune!
Well, Sam, if finding a quiet and peaceful place to live and take care of your children and animals was all that your wanderings were about then perhaps “Transnistria” (and Romania, maybe, in a predictable future) is seemingly not it. Maybe you are starting to suspect that that idyllic place you’re seeking could have been, all this time, … in Massachusetts? :) Take care.
No. Massachusetts is for normal sane people. He should go where the Supreme Beloved Leader Putin wants him: in Novosibirsk.