We Have a Winner!

Yes! Well the votes are in for the First Annual IMRTY Alison Mutler Parody Contest. Ah yes, thanks to all of you who participated!

Drum roll please….

And the winner is Lavinia with her awesome article entitled “Vampires Save Gypsies on Romanian Television”. Yay!

This was her winning entry, with some slight edits and formats:

Vampires save gypsies on Romanian television

By Alison Mutler, Associated Press

BUCHAREST, Romania – A Romanian reality show called “I’ll Dance For You”, where a small percentage of the poverty-stricken citizens have a fighting chance in order to save their life, decided to introduce another task for its participants. The whole point of the show is to find a relative of the person in need and make them dance in order to win money for medical/social treatment that most citizens can’t afford because of their low income.

The new task, called “funky jazz”, made the participants dress like vampires and perform rituals according to ancient pagan Romanian traditions while a light rain was created in the television studio because the performance “works” better when it’s raining. Three tons of water were brought in order to accomplish this in a country where most villages don’t have access to running water and basic plumbing.

Some of the “dances” did not make a very good impression on the jury. One of its members told Lavinia (one of the participants whose brother suffers from AIDS and can’t get a job because of it) “You were a bit off the rhythm with the music.” On the other hand, Iulia Vântur, who is dancing for her gypsy grandmother who is in a hospital ignored by the doctors because of her ethnicity, made quite an impression on the jury and her colleagues.

Wonderful job! And much thanks and congratulations go to Stelucia, who made me laugh with her use of the “Assassinated Press” ;)

As promised, I have emailed a copy of the contest and the winning entry to Alison Mutler, for her own edification and enjoyment. In fact, here’s the email:

From: Sam cel Roman [samcelroman@gmail.com]
To: Alison Mutler [amutler@ap.org]
Subject: First Annual IMRTY Alison Mutler Parody Contest

Dear Madam:

Here at I’m More Romanian Than You! (IMRTY!), we have long been followers of your excellent work in reporting the vital issues and news from Romania. In particular, your recent AP article about Roberta Anastase’s visit to a hairdresser, which you sourced from Click!, our country’s number one source for hard news.

It is clear that you greatly enjoy mocking Romania for fun and profit. While we here at IMRTY! cannot make the same claim to respectability and investigative journalism as you and your team at the Associated Press, we felt that a tribute to your journalistic prowess was in order.

As such, we are proud to announce that the results of the First Annual Alison Mutler Parody Contest are in (link: http://bit.ly/inJUCu) and the winning entry is below.

(winning entry inserted here)

The original article upon which this informative and well-researched article was based comes (bineinteles!) from Click!, the link to which can be found here: http://bit.ly/l33Vn3

We hope you enjoyed our attempt to emulate your unique style of journalism. Should our humble example inspire you to ever more dizzying heights of back-handed compliments, subtle insults and more openly mocking references to Dracula, vampires, magical purple tie wearing, witches and other assorted Romanian “traditions”, we would be ever so proud.

O zi frumoasa in continuare!

Sam and the entire IMRTY! team


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