…For a Fistful of Nothing


Well in case you hadn’t heard yet, Romania has now officially committed to hosting an American missile base in Deveselu, just southeast of Craiova.

This is idiocy piled on top of idiocy, but the icing on the cake can be found here (Ro), in which Bogdan Aurescu (a senior official in the Foreign Ministry) clearly states what he thinks is the deal.

My translation:

“The partnership with the United States of America is mature and solid and we’re working together to form a security zone, a military presence, and we also have firm economic and cultural ties. It was no problem to make a deal, ‘We will give you the location [for the missile base] and you’ll give us visas'” said Bogdan Aurescu in a press conference held in Slatina.

This reminds me of the old story of Lucy van Pelt:

Perhaps Lucy’s most famous gimmick in her long existence as a character is the one in which she pulls the football away from Charlie Brown right as he is about to kick it.

And if you ever read that comic strip, you’d know that she’d always promise Charlie Brown that the next time she’d hold the football still and let him kick it… and then always broke her promise.

You’d think after reading all of those Wikipedia leaks of late, the Romanian government would be a little wiser about believing anything the American government says. Alas, no:

“On the subject of the visas, you can ask Mr. Gitenstein [the current U.S. Ambassador to Romania] about it, it’s a subject that’s brought up at every meeting we have at the highest levels. We continuously discuss what would be necessary to allow Romanian citizens to freely visit the United States”… said Aurescu.

Yeah well, it’s clear Mr. Aurescu (and the rest of the Romanian government) are unfamiliar with the immortal words of George W. Bush – You forgot Poland!

Remember Poland? They’re a former Communist country in Eastern Europe. Just like Romania, they’ve sent troops to the idiocy in Afghanistan and Iraq. Just like Romania, they let the CIA operate “black sites” on their territory. Just like Romania, they want visas for their citizens. And Poland agreed to host American missiles three years ago.

Did they get their visas? Bush virtually promised them that they would. Obama promised the same. And they’re still waiting…

Aurescu si Basescu: Noi dăm locaţia pentru scut, voi daţi vize
Gitenstein: țeapă!

–or in American English–

Aurescu and Basescu: We gave you the place to base your missiles, now you give us visas.
Gitenstein: Bam! You just got punk’d!

Pitiful…

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